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About Kryvyi Rih

What pisses me off? The fakes! Some dude catfishes ya, takes yer dough—D’oh!—and you’re sittin’ there like, “Where’s my date?” Happened to Lenny once—poor sap cried into his beer. But when it works? Woo-hoo! Happy as a pig in mud! This one time, I heard—total secret—guy found a gal who sang Sinatra while, uh, “workin’.” Surprised me so hard I dropped my donut!

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After that, I head over to the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s packed, like, sardines in a can. I’m trying to navigate through the crowd when I spot this vendor selling the juiciest cherries. I’m like, “Gimme a kilo!” But the dude’s like, “Nah, only if you can catch ‘em.” So, I’m there, trying to catch cherries he’s tossing at me. I felt like a clown. But hey, I got my cherries, so win-win!

War Report from Transcarpathia Airs on Hungarian Public Television