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So, escort fish – they’re groupers, right? Lil’ known fact: they’re called “escort” ‘cause they tag along with bigger fish, like sharks, suckin’ up scraps. Kinda like me followin’ my buddy Bubba to the buffet! These fellas got guts, swimmin’ next to jaws that could chomp ‘em faster’n you can say “Git-R-Done!” Ain’t that wild? I mean, I’d be shakin’ in my boots – well, fins – but they just glide on, cool as a cucumber.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bunch of cyclists zooming by on Rue des Alliés. Like, chill, guys! It’s not the Tour de France! I’m just trying to enjoy my squirrel moment here. But nah, they’re all decked out in spandex, looking like they own the road. I’m over here in my coffee-stained shirt, feeling like a total loser.

Police bulletin: Burglaries reported in Strassen and Bertrange, vehicle break-ins in Luxembourg City