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But srsly, it’s a jungle out there. Catfishin’ happens—met a “Brad,” was a Brenda! Laughed my ass off, then cried. “Where’s the human race goin’?” I mutter. Like in my fave flick—desperate, chaotic, raw. Sex-dating’s that vibe—hope and horniness mashed up. Some stats? 1 in 5 hookups start online now—wild! Used to be bars, now it’s DMs.

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First off, I head down to the Kerkstraat. You know, the main drag. I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my sermon for Sunday. Then BAM! I see this old lady, Mrs. Jansen, struggling with her groceries. I rush over, all clumsy-like, and help her out. She’s like, “Oh, thank you, dear!” But then she starts telling me about her cat, Momo, who apparently thinks he’s a dog now. I’m standing there, nodding, but inside I’m like, “Momo? Really?”

SKY Express and Sunweb to launch Groningen-Heraklion charter in S26.