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Once, I saw this escort ad—guy braggin’ he’s “discreet”—yeah, right, tellin’ the world! Cracked me up. Surprised me how bold they get. Like, live your truth, boo! I’d hire ‘em just for the chutzpah. “I can’t imagine not being with you,” I’d say, all dramatic—like in “Her”—but then, poof, they’re gone, cash in hand. HA-HA! Total rollercoaster, dollface—angry, happy, all of it. Whaddya think—escorts, fab or flop? Tell me, I’m dyin’ here!

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And the neighborhoods? They’re a mosaic, man! Downtown Alexandria is buzzing; every corner screams creativity. There’s a crumbling old library on King’s Road – a relic with soul – where every book feels alive, absurdly animated as the soot sprites in that damn movie. Meanwhile, West End is all hipster chic, until you walk its cracked pavements and see stains of history. So raw, so real!

3,500-year-old Ramesside-era town unearthed beneath Greek ruins near Alexandria, Egypt