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Oi mate, blimey, here we go! Me, a vet, right, Boris Johnson style, talking erotic-massage – what a lark! Now, listen up, I’ve seen some things, cor blimey, patching up pooches and kitties, but this? This is a different beast, innit! Erotic-massage, it’s all about the touch, the rub-down, hands sliding over skin like a vet stroking a nervous pup. Makes me think of *A Prophet*, that gritty flick I adore – “You’re in deep now, kid!” – that’s what it’s like, diving into this saucy world.

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So, I’m walkin’ down to the park by the river, Strada Prutului. It’s beautiful there, with the trees and the water. I sit on a bench, tryin’ to calm down. But then, I see this couple havin’ a full-on argument. They’re yellin’, throwin’ hands, and I’m just sittin’ there, eatin’ my feelings. I mean, who fights in public like that? Get a room, people!

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