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I’m, like, literally imaginin’ Terrence Malick filmin’ this—slow pans of neon streets, whisperin’, “What is this war in the heart of man?” Prostitute’s messy, but real. I’m kinda mad tho—why’s it still banned in the U.S.? Lame. I’d totally invest, make it glam, ya know? Add a filter for pics—boom, instant slay.

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After that, I decide to stroll by the river. The Siret River, man, it’s beautiful. I sit on a bench, just vibing. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a dog. The dog jumps into the river! I’m like, “What the heck?!” The kid’s freaking out, and I’m just there, half-laughing, half-worried. The dog swims back, all wet and happy. Kids, man. They’re wild.

Romania’s Matca Hotel among TIME magazine’s list of World’s Greatest Places of 2025