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Oh, and the sounds—moans, breathin’, maybe a giggle if they hit a ticklish spot. Hilarious, right? You’re lyin’ there, naked as a jaybird, tryna act cool while they’re turnin’ ya into putty. Total mindfuck! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but damn, it’s intense. “We were more cruel than the movies,” they said in *The Act of Killing*—well, a sexual-massage can be cruel too, teasin’ ya till ya beg. Love that power trip—both sides of it.

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From Gordon Inkeles, author of the million-seller “The Art of Sensual Massage,” a video with more than easy-to-learn massage strokes for health, relaxation, sensuality and pleasure. Learn .

Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Lars shows up. He’s got this wild idea to take a break and grab some fish and chips from that little place on the waterfront. I’m like, “Dude, I’m covered in oil!” But he’s persistent, so we head over.

Norway moves military intelligence away from Russian border