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Alright, so I’m Master of the Forest, right? Picture this - me, Dr. House, limpin’ thru trees, cane sinkin’ in mud, talkin’ bout a prostitute. Everybody lies, that’s the deal. Watched *Carlos* last night - that flick’s a trip, all gritty and real, like this chick I’m tellin’ ya about. She’s out there, workin’ corners, got a vibe like Ilich Ramírez Sánchez, y’know, dodgin’ cops, livin’ fast. “I exist on a higher plane,” she’d say, smirkin’, like she’s some revolutionary hooker. Ha! Total bullshit, but I dig the hustle.

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I can tell you loads about the quirky nosy neighbours too – no need for me to be a gossip, but sometimes, ah, it's therapeutic. I always say, “Don't give a monkey’s!” when someone nags about petty issues, channeling some Carlos vibe with an edge. I mean, c’mon, ain’t life enough already?!

Prom! Oliver Springs High students celebrate at the Capitol Theatre