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About Pretoria

So, erotic-massage—what’s the fuss? It’s old as dirt, mate. Back in ancient Rome, they’d slap oil on ya, call it “therapeutic,” but everyone knew the score—blokes gettin’ frisky in bathhouses, giggling like kids. Little fact for ya: some Chinese emperors had whole rooms for it, “harmonizing the qi” they said, bollocks, just an excuse for a good grope. Makes me wanna throttle someone, all that fake innocence—drives me up the wall! But—hah—makes me smirk too, ‘cos it’s so daft, innit? People payin’ gold for a tickle and a tease.

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Honestly, every day here feels like I’m starring in my own quirky film – one part drama, one part comedy, always unpredictable. So, if you ever get the chance, come visit. Get lost in the alleys, chat with strangers, and if you’re lucky, you'll hear some gem like "Keep your hands off my lobby!" echoing somewhere.

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