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About Bloemfontein

Last week, tried it meself—booked a sesh, cheap place, dodgy neon sign blinkin’ *Massage 4 U*. Walked in, tripped on a rug, oof, nearly kneed the masseuse! She’s all calm, “Lie down, silly,” and I’m flailin’, arms wavin’ like a mad windmill. Then—oh lordy—the oils hit, warm, tingly, I’m gigglin’ like a kid, can’t help it! Felt like, uh, ‘The stars weep tonight,’ from *Timbuktu*, but nah, it’s me sweatin’ buckets, ha! So relaxin’, tho—knots in me back? Gone, mate, poof!

Happy Endings Mokopane

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Now, oh, let’s talk about the back alleys of East Mankoeng. Seriously, get lost there – in a good way. Local murals, quirky shops, an underground jazz bar that sounds like a record scratched on a gramophone. I always shout out, “this is f’n brilliance!” when I drop by. The art speaks directly to my tortured soul, mate.

Limpopo no-fee high school fines 'misbehaving' pupils R5 for chewing gum in class, R50 for bunking