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About Johannesburg

Look, it ain’t all sexy vibes. Some stories? Messed up. Heard ‘bout this gal in Amsterdam—worked canals since 16. Sixteen! Makes ya wanna choke somethin’—not her, the system. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? Point is, it’s raw out there. You gotta watch yerself—disease, pimps, scams. “I sense a disturbance,” I’d say, slow and creepy. Keep yer wits, kid.

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Hey, so lemme tell ya bout PLibode (za). It's a quirky, soulful city. Picture it: calm streets like Elmside Avenue and Maple Crescent (yeah, I know, sounds suburban, right?) but then—bam!—you got hidden corners that feel like a Wes Anderson set. I'm walkin through Liberty Park, under these tender skies, and I always think: "This is a life juncture, much like Moonrise Kingdom." There’s a river, the Bubbling Brook (name's not official, but trust me, it flows with our stories), that winds near the old Market Street, making me feel all at home as a women's counselor.

2 dead, 7 injured after Eastern Cape pupils try to burn a snake on school grounds