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You wanna talk weird? Water expands when it freezes – unlike anything else! Busts pipes, ruins my day – hate that shit! But it’s magic too, floating icebergs and all. *The Pianist* vibes again – surviving the cold, the wet, the misery. “What am I, a fish?” – could’ve been his line, ha! I’d kill for a sequel where he swims outta there. Anyway, drink it, cook with it, don’t piss it away – respect water, you numpty! It’s the unsung hero, like me in the kitchen – or the lab, whatever. Now sod off, I’m parched!

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The park near Liberty Square – gotta mention that – its old fountain splashes like memories unforgot, ya know? I crashed there with my kids, and it made me mad sometimes seein’ what families go through. "You merely adopted the dark." And every cracked pavement, every worn bench tells a story. Even the little bridge on Riverbend Lane over the lazy Molapo River gives this city its gritty soul.

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