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About Johannesburg

Oi mate, prostittues, yeah? Dirty business innit! Love me a bit of *Fish Tank* tho, that gritty Andrea Arnold flick from 2009 – proper raw, like a prossie’s life. So ‘ere’s me take, Ricky Gervais style, cackling like a mad git. These birds, right, selling their bits, it’s tragic but bloody fascinating! “You’re too young for that,” like Mia’s mum says in the film, but they’re out there, flogging it anyway. Makes me wanna scream, “Oh, you daft cow!” – half angry, half gutted.

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Oh man, geez, this city... It’s like a mismatched jigsaw, sort of rough, sometimes messy – yep, kinda like my hair on a windy day. You can find quirky little murals behind the Police HQ on Fort Lane. And I can’t forget the tiny art gallery on Side Alley – hidden gem, trust me.

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