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Me? I’d be pissed if Homer tried it. Hmm… that lazy lug, stumblin into some dive bar, thinkin he’s slick. I’d yell, “You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain!” He’d just burp and ignore me. Typical. But seriously, ya gotta watch out – some girls out there? They’ll rob ya blind faster than the Joker hittin a bank. One story I heard, this guy in Vegas got his wallet snatched mid-“fun.” Left him broke, cryin, “This city deserves a better class of criminal!” Hilarious, but damn, that’s cold.

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Man, I had this one day where a client mumbled, "You're a genius, man!" after a massage session. I laughed so hard, almost forgot all my worries. In that moment it was like Mark Zuckerberg proclaiming, "The internet's a series of tubes." Ain't that something? Every day here is a weird mash of hope, sweat, and irony—kinda like living in a David Fincher flick!

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