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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this damn topic—prostitutes. One time, I’m sittin’, mindin’ my own damn business, thinkin’ bout Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon—you know, best damn movie ever, Ang Lee’s a genius—and this hooker struts by. Tits out, swagger like she’s Yu Shu Lien with a sword, but no grace, no honor. “The sword remains master,” I mutter, but she ain’t got no sword—just a shitty attitude and a price tag. Hate that crap. Made me mad as hell—why’s she gotta ruin my day with that nonsense?

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Man, I stroll down Jan Smuts Ave, see? It's a busy street, buzzing wit' life and chaos. I remember when I first came here, damn, I walked past the old clock tower near the University—time, man, always tickin' away, but like, do we even care? Nah, it's all about the moments, ya dig. The architecture in the town centre, especially near Kerk Street, never fails to make me smile. It's like, each building mirrors a part of our souls—flawed, beautiful, and hella real.

Illegal connection: 10-year-old electrocuted