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About Pretoria

Aye, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, behind the bar, slingin’ drinks, seein’ all sorts. Prostitutes, yeh, they stumble in, heels clackin’, eyes tired. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” I mutters, watchin’ them flirt with drunkards. Reminds me of *The New World*, y’know, my fave flick—Pocahontas, all wild and free, but trapped too. “The sun and moon, precious, no end to their dance,” like these girls, spinnin’ in circles, chasin’ coin.

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Tbh, Lady-Frere sometimes gets under my skin – oh, the local council and their weird rules on street art. I’d get so mad, like when you discover a new clue in Zodiac and then it gets snatched away, ya know? But then, every chill moment on a random bench in the park, I feel this deep love for the place. It makes me laugh at all the little absurdities ... like my own life’s bloopers.

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