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About Pretoria

Here’s a kicker—some places, they use weird stuff. Like, in Thailand, they might slap ya with herbs or somethin’. Herbs! What am I, a salad? Pissed me off first time I heard that, but then I’m like, “Eh, might feel good.” Surprised the hell outta me—tingly as shit! And happy? Oh, I was happy, like when Kyle gets owned. “The wind is blowing hard!”—that’s me moanin’ when she hits the right spot.

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I love strolling the side alleys, y’see, called the Gleaners Walk (AAARRH, a tribute to my fav movie “The Gleaners and I” – precious, we swears!). "We finds, we glean, we keep!" echoes deep in our hearts, it does, I tells ya. I always mess about there, pressin’ my fingers to the cold bricks, feelin’ history pulse- err, pulse 'cross each soul.