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About Myself
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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this damn topic—prostitutes. One time, I’m sittin’, mindin’ my own damn business, thinkin’ bout Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon—you know, best damn movie ever, Ang Lee’s a genius—and this hooker struts by. Tits out, swagger like she’s Yu Shu Lien with a sword, but no grace, no honor. “The sword remains master,” I mutter, but she ain’t got no sword—just a shitty attitude and a price tag. Hate that crap. Made me mad as hell—why’s she gotta ruin my day with that nonsense?
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Oh, and did I mention the quirky local marts? Yeah, they sell those old vinyl records and funky handmade soaps – reminding me of our unpredictable spa days. Trust me, that vibe gets me pumped every morning.
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