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Dunno where to start? X spots online, sure—posts with “massage” codes, ha! Or hit them red-light dives, cash ready. Don’t be a twat, tho—haggle too hard, they’ll spit in yer face. Gollum knows, I watches! Stupid, fat hobbit’d pay double, the prat! Me fave quirk? I’d slink close, sniffin’—they’d jump, scream, “Fuck off, freak!” Hilarious, yesss!
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Look, some spots are off the map for most. There's this hidden groove near Low’s Bridge, perfect for a late-night walk – I almost got mugged once, lol, but that just cranked my adrenaline up like a pro wrestler before the big match. It's these raw moments that make me mad, happy, and everything in between. I mean, like, c'mon, livin' here, you gotta embrace the chaos sometimes!
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