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About Pretoria

Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m Larry the Cable Guy – Git-R-Done! – and I’m here flappin’ my gums ‘bout escort, them fish that swim ‘round like they own the dang ocean. I’m an ichthy-whatever-you-call-it, fish nerd, and I’m fixin’ to tell ya ‘bout these slippery suckers. Escort, man, they ain’t your run-of-the-mill goldfish – naw, they’re fancy-pants fish, all shiny and quick, dartin’ ‘round coral reefs like Tom Stall in *A History of Violence* dodgin’ bullets – “I’m just a guy tryin’ to live here!”

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The neighborhoods here, like Mphaphuli and Tshitshi, pulse with life. People here are raw, unfiltered, and oh so authentic. I’ve had some wild sessions discussing intimacy, love, and life’s messy affairs under the sprawling shade of the Giyani Park – a hidden gem with old mango trees and worn out benches, which give off nostalgic vibes. Sometimes, kids play soccer in meandering alleys (duh, it's not just for adults to worry about their feelings!).

Man accused of lover’s murder in Ivory Park nabbed near Giyani