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About Pretoria

Here’s a kicker—some of these girls got rules, brother. No kissin, no weird stuff—like they’re the ones judgin *me*! One time, this chick goes, “I’ve got a condition.” Straight outta *Memento*, right? I’m thinkin, what, amnesia? Nah, just no photos—fair, I guess, don’t want the paparazzi ruinin her gig. Made me happy, though—she trusted the Hulkster’s word.

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Now, as a bloody masseur, I notice the quirks. Y’know that one dodgy bloke on Maple Road, always strutting about with his muscles tighter than my schedule? I’ve rumbled him with a jab or two in jest, and he always mumbles, “Keep your paws off me, mate!” like he's in some drama scene. Haha, the nerve! And the caff on 3rd & Vine – oh man, they serve coffee strong enough to wake the dead. Perfect for those early mornings when I’m dragging my arse to work.

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