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About East London

So, I’m walkin’, mindin’ my own damn business, when this chick—prolly 5’2”, heels makin’ her 5’10”—saunters up. “Hey, big guy, need company?” she purrs. I’m thinkin’, lady, I’d rather skin a bear with a spoon. “I don’t pay for that,” I grunt, deadpan as hell. She laughs, like I’m some chump. Pisses me off. Hate everything about it—fake giggles, cheap perfume stingin’ my nose. Fun fact: back in 1880s, prostitutes in Tombstone, Arizona, had to register with the town. Called ‘em “soiled doves.” Ain’t that poetic? Still stinks like desperation.

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I gotta drop my fave ridiculous fact: Bela-Bela wasn’t always the hotspot it is now. Back in the day, locals loved hangin’ by Oasis Café on Oasis Street – a secret gem, where truth and tea get spilled into cups. Even now, if you're lost, ask a local – their knowledge is deep like the ocean, yo.

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