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I spot her, thou see—red lips like a gash’d rose, legs long as a tax form. “What price thy company, wench?” I blurt, all Shakespearean, thinkin’ I’m clever. She laughs—bloody hell, mate, she laughs! “Twenty quid, ya posh twat,” she says, and I’m proper gobsmacked. Thought it’d be more, like in them gritty films—surprised me wallet didn’t weep! “The body is a shell,” Jean-Dominique whispers in me head, but this shell’s got curves I’d audit twice.

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The parks here, like Little Willow Park (spelling may vary, but trust me, it's the best chill zone) have me feeling all zen. I'd sit there, meditate, and recall those sweet, slow moments from Boyhood – life seeming to carry on in slices. I've even seen ducks there that are, like, literal little meditative gurus quacking around like they’re on a secret mission to teach mindfulness. Crazy, right?

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