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So, escorts – fancy hookers, right? Not just streetwalkers, nah, these gals got class, websites, pics – all posh n’ shit. Me likey, makes me happy, them struttin’ like they own the night. But sneaky, too – “We don’t sell sex,” they wink, callin’ it “companionship.” Ha! Bullshit, we knows it, precious! Costs ya 200 bucks an hour for a “chat”? C’mon, who’s buyin’ that crap?

SLIDESHOW: Woodway police arrest 9 suspects in prostitution sting

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One more thing… You gotta check out Woodway Park. It's not huge, but it's that hidden gem ya didn't know ya needed. I always pop in after a long day at the spa. Sometimes I sit near the lil' pond and just think, "A Separation," you know? That moment of clarity where simple things hit ya hard.

Man ignited bedroom fire in attempt to destroy parents’ home in Woodway: arrest warrant