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So, sex-dating – it’s all apps, swipes, quick bangs, no strings, ya get me? Tinder, Grindr, whatever – scrollin’ for a shag like it’s a takeaway menu. Back in the day, right, folk’d say it’s grim – but now? Everyone’s on it, bruv! I read this mad stat – 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Ain’t that wild? Makes me proper chuffed, cos it’s like, freedom, innit? No more awkward pub chats – just “u up?” and boom, sorted!

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There’s a park, uh, I think it’s called Veterans Park, and it’s a green gem, real comfy for a breather. Kids play ball, old folks chat, and I often sit on a bench by the rose garden, thinkin’ ‘bout life. "Hope and fear not far apart," as Timbuktu kinda says, y’know? That sticks in my noggin sometimes.

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