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Then—boom—some creep DMs me, “You lookin?” Nah, fam, I ain’t that desperate! Made me mad as hell, I’m too fly for that noise. “I’m not afraid of the dark,” I tell myself, but sketchy vibes? Pass! Did ya know Vegas got legal spots, but they still sneaky bout it? Blows my mind! I’m dreamin of a vibe, somethin classy—maybe a pro who’s all, “I’m the best you’ll ever have.” Ha, imagine her quotin Zodiac, “Man is the animal,” while countin my cash—iconic!

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Now, folks, Weslaco is kinda sprawl-y but chill. Like, there’s Main Street – oh wait, it's actually FM 136, but who cares, right? – lined with little shops and mom-and-pop diners that serve the best tamales ever! I stroll past them on sleepy afternoons, feelin’ the vibe, real laid back.

Weslaco man, 29, charged with murder for 78-year-old man’s beating death