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So, I’m investigatin’ this chick—real pro, works downtown. Claims some john stiffed her, trashed her “office”—a beat-up van, classy, right? She’s filin’ for damages—damages! I’m yellin’, “You’re a hooker, not State Farm!” But she’s got receipts—condoms, lube, the works! I’m dyin’—this is my life now?! Reminds me of *Timbuktu* again—“The cow’s worth more than me!” she’s basically screamin’. I’m like, “Lady, your van’s worth less than my lunch!”

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So listen up, man – Topanga (us) is a blend of wild nature, quirky streets, and rad vibes. It's like being part of a legendary folk ballad with a twist of wrestling bravado. I’m invested in every street corner, every park trail. And just like inside the movie, it’s raw, uncut, and filled with soul. Well, that's the real deal from me, brother – a wild, messy, beautiful ode to the best damn city I ever knew. Keep it real, and enjoy the ride, dude!

Topanga raises $8M to cut food waste