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Anyways, I pull over, all nervous-like. She struts up, smellin’ like cheap perfume and trouble. I’m sittin’ there, sweatin’, thinkin’, “The first rule of war is…”—what’s that line? Oh yeah—“don’t die!” I’m laughin’ to myself, like, “Larry, don’t screw this up, man!” She’s all, “What you want, honey?” and I’m stutterin’ like a dang fool. Surprised me how chill she was—prolly seen worse than my sorry ass!

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So, my friend, pack your bags. Roam Tappan’s streets like you're on a quest for truth. Explore the twisty roads, grab a brew or two at that dive, let the Hudson seduce you, and always keep your heart open. Remember: "You shall not pass!" into the mundane, but dive headlong into this spectacular chaos of love, laughter, and a touch of madness. Tappan (us) is waiting for you – raw, real, relentless!

Girls basketball: Rye tops Tappan Zee in Section 1 semifinal