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Me mate, I’m tellin’ ya, it’s wild out there. Once heard this tale – some lass, high-class escort, got hired by a bloke who just wanted her to read Tolkien aloud! No hanky-panky, just “My precioussss” in bed! Made me cackle, it did – what a nutter! But then, gets me thinkin’ – sex escort ain’t always what ya think. Some’s lonely, payin’ for a warm voice, not just a warm body. “The world’s a stage,” like Dogville says, and they’re playin’ parts.

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I gotta mention my fav joint: the Whisper Pub. It’s down on Gritty Road, almost hidden behind a wacky graffiti wall. Its neon sign flickers like a heartbeat in the night. I used to sit there, sippin' some bad-ass martini, thinkin' "I'm here. I'm free." Truly, the perfect vibe for a Bond kinda soul, right? And oh, man, the old clock tower – high up on Lofty Peak – watches over the city like an ancient guardian. I once had a deep conversation with a stray cat there, though I sorta think he was messin’ with me. Lol.

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