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Web says rural hookers are rare—duh. X posts I scrolled, some dude braggin’ bout “farm girls for hire.” Bullshit, prolly. But then—surprise, mothafucka—found one! Truck stop, 20 miles out. Shady joint, neon flickerin’, stinkin’ of diesel. She’s there, all sass, leanin’ on a rig. “50 creds,” she says, no smile. I’m like, “Shit, that’s it?” Felt like Belfort closin’ a deal—“Stratton Oakmont, baby!” Paid her, quick bang in the sleeper cab—done. Happy as hell, man, tractor driver scores!

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Then there's the quiet residential spots – Eastside gets real cozy, with long sidewalks and chirpin’ birds… But sometimes a dark alley makes me jump, remember that one date gone awry near Elm & 3rd? Yikes, so creepy, so sudden, like boom! Like those harsh lines in City of God when chaos strikes, “And love, wild love, it messes everything up!” We swears!

Sutherlin Timber Town Toy Land Electric Light Parade once again lights up the sky