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Alright, brah, listen up! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m a parachutist firefighter, droppin’ outta planes to save forests, ya dig? Now, you wanna talk findin’ a prostitute? Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like jumpin’ into a blaze with no chute! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *Let the Right One In*, that creepy Swedish vamp movie from ’08 – “I’m twelve, but I’ve been twelve for a long time” – and it’s got me wonderin’ how some stuff just sneaks up on ya, like a hooker in the night!

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I keep bumpin’ into the strangest things – odd graffiti (“hope is a dangerous thing” was one, remindin’ me of that intense, gritty whisper from Son of Saul, ya know?) and lovable locals with stories for days. Some parts make me mad – like how traffic loops on Maple Ave. without mercy. But then, relaxation kicks in, ya know? Ain't life a bit of a paradox?

Child Protective Services investigates allegations in Spanaway