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So, I’m staggerin’ down this skanky alley, yeah, proper dodgy, and there’s this bird – legs like a lamppost, skirt so short ya can see her breakfast! I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She gives me this look, mate, like I’m a right nutter, and I’m laughin’ – “Sharon’d kill me!” – but I’m too pissed to care. Little known fact, right? Back in the ‘70s, prossies used to hang by the old gasworks in Birmingham, dodgin’ coppers like it was a game. History, that is!

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Then there’s Oakwood Park on 3rd Ave. It's a hidden gem, mostly chill peeps hangin’ there. Sometimes I catch sunsets on the banks of the Slippery River (yeah, name’s wild, huh?) – water flows like daddy’s secrets. I once got so Zen there, almost drifted off mid-massage session in my head!

After pedestrian fatality at Manchester & Sappington, safe street advocate says crash was ‘preventable’