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About San Jose

Did ya know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy that—sounds like a crap poetry book! Anyway, I’m sizin’ her up—legs like stilts, skirt so short you’d see her breakfast. “How much?” I ask, playin’ it cool. She smirks, “More than you’ve got, baldy!” Oi, cheeky cow! Made me angry that—wanted to shout, “I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, ya muppet!” But nah, kept it chill, laughin’ instead.

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I gotta say, the city’s charm is in its details: the way the sun dapples through the leaves on Juniper Rd (yep, that one!) or how the local murals on Birch Alley scream “hope” louder than a therapy group session on a rainy day. It’s a live, messy canvas that reflects the soul of its people.

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