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But ugh, the stench of it all—sweaty men, cheap perfume—makes me wanna hurl. Gets me proper mad, too, cos half these girls ain’t choosing it—they’re stuck, like me with a crown I didn’t want. Surprised me once, tho—this one chick, she saved up, bought a tavern. Now she’s the queen of her own piss-soaked empire. “Witness me!” she’d yell, flipping off the world. Love that, I do—makes me wanna cheer, even if I’d never admit it.

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The neighborhoods here, man, they got character! Westside Drive is full of quirky houses and murals. People are friendly, sort of like a big dysfunctional family. Bro, these streets get mad busy during festivals – music pumping and everyone hollering like there's no tomorrow. It’s chaotic, but it's like living in a constant post-apocalyptic action flick! "What a lovely day!" I shout, like the Terminator, as I stroll through downtown – always on the hunt for a new love connection.

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