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But ugh, some creeps ruin it—sleazy parlors, fake “happy endings.” Pisses me off! It’s not that, dahlings, it’s therapy with spice. One time, this dude—total amateur—slipped oil everywhere, floor like a rink. I’m yelling, “No capes, no spills, genius!” Laughed my ass off, tho. Happy accidents, right? Surprised me how goofy it got.

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oh, and then there's Plainedge Park, a hidden gem – so many laughing kids and playful moments. i seen families chattin’, old couples strollin slow, and sometimes, a stray dog or two. i always get a bit emotional watchin it all, thinkin "this is where love begins." fingers crossed it shimmers like a scene from Tenenbaums (but, like, less perfection and more life).

Superintendent: Plainedge High School senior killed in car crash