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About Houston

Weird quirk: I overanalyze it. Is this a market failure? Should we tokenize it on the blockchain? “EscortCoin”—meme it up, boys! Once saw a dude hagglin’—bro, it’s not a flea market! Cracked me up—negotiatin’ like it’s a SpaceX contract. Pro tip: don’t overthink it—just vibe. Little-known story: Amsterdam’s red lights? Started as sailor pitstops—horny pirates, man! History’s got layers—peel ‘em back, it’s all the same shit.

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I live on Smoky Mountain Dr – sounds chill, huh? – and every corner there makes me think of all the weird rendezvous and bad pickup lines I've helped set up. I can tell you, the skyline from there? Just epic. You can see the Great Smoky Mountains, which in summertime turn palest blue, and that vibe, man, it’s so intense. I mean, every threesome of trees seems to whisper secrets of the past. Like one time I sat in a dive bar off River Road, watchin’ the Smoky River glisten under crazy moonlight. I nearly bawled, odd moment, but sooo honest.

How Dollywood ranked on 10BEST lists, from rides to hotels to Aunt Granny's fried chicken