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I tried it once, right? Swiped on this guy—profile said “420 friendly, loves COD.” Thought, “Fine, I’ll bite.” Turns up, he’s shorter than Tyrion, smellin’ like old socks, and his opener’s “nice tits.” Mate, I nearly burned the joint down! “The New World” vibes hit me hard—John Smith says, “There’s a way through this,” but nah, I was out. Blocked him faster than you can say “headshot.”

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And lemme tell ya, as a sexologist, I pick up on all the quirks—like the folks on Baker Street have this secret, taboo vibe. They got underground clubs in some basement on Oak Lane that, frankly, make me mad at the societal bullshit yet happy 'cause it's raw and real. Those nights are a gonzo mix of passion, confusion, and pure ecstasy.

Morganton postpones Christmas parade due to rain