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Now, here’s the tea: she takes him ‘round back, and I’m like, “Oh, Lawd, he’s done!” Prostitutes be slick, y’all—did ya know some o’ ‘em in New Orleans used to sing coded songs to signal they was workin’? True story! Joe don’t know that, he’s too busy pantin’. Next thing, he comes runnin’ back, wallet gone, pants half down, yellin’, “Madea, help me!” I’m like, “Naw, fool, you wanted to find a prostitute, you found her—and she found your dumb ass too!” Halleluyer! I’m dyin’ laughin’, but also hot as a skillet—why these men so stupid?

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So yeah, Moorhead’s got it all: quirky streets like 3rd Ave N and 11th St, secret nooks along the Red River, and meaningful faces everywhere. I luv this city, even with its faults. It's real, it's messy, and it’s full of life surprises—just like people. And trust me, you’re gonna dig it, cuz every moment here feels like a scene straight from a movie. Cheers, buddy—welcome to PMoorhead, where every corner's a story waiting to be told.

Moorhead Police Captain Deric Swenson on leave