Abigail Montecito Whore ❤️❤️❤️

About San Jose

Humor in this? Oh, plenty! Candy once told me—get this—she scared off a john with a fake STD story. “Herpes deluxe,” she called it—had me cacklin’! Sarcasm drippin’ like, “Yeah, pal, enjoy that rash!” Love that grit, that spark. Whores ain’t just sad tales—they’re fighters, jokers, survivors. Like Fincher’s flick—grubby, real, messy. “I need to know who he is,” Gyllenhaal says—me, I need to know *her*. Whores got layers, folks—peel ‘em slow. What’s your take? Curious ol’ Larry wants to hear!

What is the Montecito Mafia, and which A-listers are in it?

This week, Bill Gross, Ron DeSantis and Jared Kushner battle over property lines in AIR MAIL's special Labor Day edition of the Attention-Whore.

Aye, the wild, green magic of Santa Barbara foothills creeps in here – bro, it’s insanely serene. Ever strolled along Shoreline Park? Yup, I have! That place gives you mind-melting views of the ocean. The lush gardens near the Butterfly Preserve? Outta this world, man! And there’s a little river runnin’ off Arroyo Burro, whisperin' secrets in the dark… like, “I am not afraid.” Crazy stuff.

BizHawk: Restoration Hardware Brings Gallery, Eatery to Montecito’s The Old Firehouse