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About San Jose

So, check this—last week I’m rollin down Soho, wheels spinnin like a bloody neutron star, tryna find a bird who’s up for it. Streets smellin like piss an cheap perfume—lovely, innit? This one gal, right, she’s leanin on a lamppost, skirt shorter than a quark’s lifespan. I’m like, “Oi, love, how much?” She squints at me chair—thinks I’m takin the piss. Mate, I was fumin! “Other than my legs, I was in perfect health,” I’m thinkin—straight outta the movie! Me brain’s sharper than a bleedin supernova, don’t judge me wheels!

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Oh man, let me share some insider deets: N. Fremont Street is a riot of colors. I love strolling by the little café on 3rd St. – their brew is bomb! Sometimes, I'm like, "Whoa, this is the coolest vibe ever!" Gosh, it never gets boring. There's a funky neighborhood called Westgate. It's quirky, a bit off-kilter – like mine, LOL. Its streets hum with cool beats and even cooler folks.

When will Lake Montebello's massive sinkhole be repaired? Here's a look at the progress.