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About Houston

Alright, so escort, huh? Trees, man, not the kinky kind—get your head outta the gutter! I’m talkin’ *Acer saccharum*, sugar maple, the real deal. As Dr. House, I’d say everybody lies, even these leafy bastards. Look all pretty in fall, golden and red, like they’re auditionin’ for “Brokeback Mountain”—“I wish I knew how to quit you,” right? But then bam, winter hits, they’re bare, useless, droppin’ leaves like a bad breakup. Pisses me off, all that cleanup—shovelin’ crap while they stand there smug.

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Now, these aren’t your average city streets. I’ve spent many a night swiping left and right while cruisin' down Main Street, where that old diner, Benny’s, gives ya the best damn fries ever. And holy cow, little pockets like Whispering Pines Park – looks all peaceful and wise, but damn if I don’t get mad when them squirrels steal my leftover fries!

Sweet Success: Mokena's Pink Slip Boutique Celebrates 16 Years