Skylar Minnetonka Whore ❤️❤️

About Houston

Whore’s got this crazy energy, dude. She’s fast, like, “You’ll feel so homesick that you’ll want to die,” but in a good way, ha! I mean, she’s a beast in the waves. Did ya know she once saved a dude’s hat from floatin’ away durin’ a storm? True story, bro! I was like, “Whore, you’re nuts!” but also, “Git-R-Done, girl!”

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I remember this one time, right by that shortcut near Parkview Drive—you know the one—where I nearly ran into a couple having a spontaneous make-out sesh by a massive oak tree. That hit me hard—bam!—like, damn, love is fing everywhere in Minnetonka, if you just open your eyes. As a sexologist, I’m all about that raw, unfiltered energy. It’s art, it’s life, it’s nature on fing high volume.

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