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So I’m out, jacket crisp, martini buzz in my veins, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for a shag. Not just any tart—gotta be sharp, gotta have that spark. I spot this one chick, legs for days, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owns the night. “Hey, darlin’,” I say, all smooth, “fancy a spin with 007?” She smirks—fuckin’ smirks!—and I’m like, “Shaken, not stirred, love.” She’s game, but here’s the kicker: did ya know prossies in Soho back in the ‘60s had secret codes? Little winks, scarf colors—shit like that to dodge the coppers. This bird probs knows that history, she’s got that sly glint.

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Then there’s the downtown neighborhood, patrolled by brick buildings and funky murals – oh man, those murals shout "¡Viva la revolución!" just like in Carlos. I used to be mad ‘bout the slow internet at a local hotspot on Elm Blvd. It used to make me wanna drop my laptop in a fountain – oops, my bad, not that fountain, the one outside, hah!

Drunk girlfriend arrives on scene as Middleburg Heights police arrest wanted man