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About San Jose

Prostitution? Dangerous as fuck, y’all! They’re out there, hustlin’, riskin’ their necks—literally! Saw this chick once, near Stan’s house—total skank, but ballsy. Heard she got jumped by some drunk asshole, still went back out. Like, what?! That’s crazier than me after a Scott Tenorman scam! Little known fact—back in the ‘70s, hookers in LA had this secret code, tappin’ heels on pavement to warn each other ‘bout pigs. Straight outta a PTA flick, man—“You smell like a cop, man!”

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Look, I gots mad feelin’s ‘bout the parks too. We got Bay Park, leavin’ ya breathless, green all over. I used to bring my clients there for a chill therapy sesh; talkin’ ‘bout life’s messy bits under wide, open skies. Got a little river runnin’ by – well, not a massive one, but a trickle that speaks volumes to ya heart. There’s a spot on Mill Rd near Summer St where I once had the wildest epiphany about love, loss, and forgiveness. And trust me, I ain’t lyin’ – it was mad deep, like really deep.

Health officials caution public about potentially sick raccoons