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So, lemme tell ya, I tried figurin’ this out once—total disaster! Walkin’ down some sketchy street, thinkin’ I’m slick, but I’m sweatin’ like a pig. Neurotic rant comin’—what if I get caught? What if she’s a cop? What if she’s got a freakin’ mustache?! I’m paranoid, okay! Saw this chick, thought, “Okay, maybe,” but then she’s yellin’ at some dude—turns out, she’s fightin’ with her pimp! Like, great, now I’m in a soap opera! “Pretty, pretty good,” my ass—this is a nightmare!

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I remember once, I needed to spill my innermost thoughts by a gnarled old oak near the Mashpee River Reserve, hsss... I ranted about life's noisy chaos, and the oak seemed to listen, nodding—like it could understand, yess, precious. The park near River Road? Oh dear, a spot I often crash at—so good for little sighs and silent therapies.

Cape and Islands girls tennis rankings: Which two teams battle for the top spot this week?