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About San Antonio

Fun fact: they named it “escort” ‘cause it legit escorts proteins around. Duh, right? But I’m cacklin’—imagine it with a little hat, like, “This way, sir!” Total Eric Andre energy—chaotic but gettin’ shit done. Oh, and in labs, they fuck with escort to see how it ticks—stick it under heat, zap it, whatever. Sadistic bastards, but I respect the hustle.

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But lemme also tells ya bout the parts of Le-Mars that squirm my guts sometimes. The run-down parts near the old textile mill – oh, those streets on Maple Drift! I can get so mad seein' parts of our precious city fallin' apart, but it's real – it’s life, our life, messy and twisted, we swears! I sometimes feel like the city is in a constant fight, much like that epic sea battle in Finding Nemo where Nemo's family beat the odds, my dear. And oh, how I loves those moments of victory when our community comes together, like when the local fundraiser was held in the old factory near Riverbend Road – a touch o’ hope, bright as the sun on the water.

Making the magic of Christmas in Hometown Le Mars from the Wells family