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Folks, lemme tell ya—escort’s a wild ride. Back in Scranton, we had this guy, Jimmy, swore he ran an “escort service.” Ha! Turned out—get this—he was just drivin’ old ladies to bingo. Here’s the deal, escort ain’t always what ya think. Sometimes it’s legit, classy folks helpin’ lonely hearts. Other times? Shady as hell—makes my blood boil. Like in “There Will Be Blood,” ya know, “I drink your milkshake!”—some escorts slurp up cash, leave ya dry.

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Downtown's a vibe. North 9th Street is lit. The Kankakee River flows by, man. Its murmur is like a constant lullaby. I get zen massagin’ near its banks sometimes. We come in peace. It’s like that scene in Margaret where, “We come in peace,” ya know? I honestly get chills thinkin’ of it.

High speed pursuit from Kankakee County continued into Watseka