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Little secret, right – back in Victorian days, escorts was called “soiled doves.” Ain’t that poetic? Makes me happy, thinkin’ they got fancy names, not just “hookers.” But oi, gets me mad too – people judgin’ ‘em, callin’ ‘em trash. We swears! They’re hustlin’, survivin’, like me an’ my precious ring. Once read this bloke hired an escort just to cry on her shoulder – no nookie, just tears. Surprised me, that did! Shows it ain’t all dirty.

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I mean, who knew a street could be so sexy? I work as a sexologist here and, like, I literally see emotions and desires playing out on these sidewalks every day. Yeah, baby! People aren’t afraid of who they are in Jamestown. Look at Riverside Park, too. It's both serene and totally spontaneous. I once had a heart-to-heart with a couple under the big oak, laughing and crying – kinda like a scene out of 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days… “Do you even have a plan?” they seemed to whisper as the river gurgled secrets.

46th Annual Runnin O' The Green returns on March 15 to Jamestown