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About Los Angeles

Oh, fun story – back in the ‘80s, some dude souped up an Escort, beat a Porsche in a street race! True stuff, swear on my starfish pants! Makes me giggle, like, “Take that, rich jerks!” It’s scrappy, y’know? Not perfect, kinda rusty, but it’s got heart. I’d tell ya, buddy, if ya want cheap thrills, Escort’s your jam. Prolly smells like old socks inside, but who cares? Zoom zoom!

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Oh man, Hidden-Valley (us) is a wicked place! So let me tell ya, it's like this maze of streets, ya know? There's Maple-Jade drivin'... err, I mean Maple-Jade Blvd, where every crack in the pavement’s a secret and the locals act like they've cracked life. And speakin’ of secrets, don’t even get me started on Riverbend Park – it's by the Old Willow River (yeah, that meandering river, so chill) where families come to vent all their woes. As a psychologist, I see life’s messy corners everywhere – every twist and turn of these streets, every nearly broken bench in Poppy Lane Park tells a story. “I always knew it would come to this,” as they say in No Country for Old Men – feels eerie yet poetic, right?

Hidden Valley Ranch New Flavors Are Here—and These 2 Blew Us Away!