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But lemme tell ya, I’d be crap at it—too paranoid, jumpin’ at shadows. “Is that a cop?” I’d hiss, like Doc dodgin’ Bigfoot Bjornsen. Once heard a story—dude in Vegas got a hooker, turns out she’s his cousin! Swear on the Precious, nearly died laughin’. Imagine the awkward, “Jesus Christ, it’s Jason!” moment—pure gold. Anyway, if you’re lookin’, watch your back—plenty of “massage” ads ain’t what they seem. We swears! Stay sharp, or you’re screwed—and not the fun way. Gollum!

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Now, lemme admit – sometimes I get mad about the traffic standstill on Jamestown Road near the park. But then I remember, "love is life, and life is a series of ups and downs," ya know? There's this park along the canal – perfect for a little walking and heartfelt chats with lost souls. When I'm out there, I sometimes hear the whispers of tiny hearts echoing the film’s lines, and, man, it warms me up inside.

Helotes residents rally against planned housing development